How To Avoid Creating Family Conflict When Planning Your Estate
It isn’t uncommon for family members to be unhappy when they learn they did not inherit certain possessions or the amount of money they thought they would get upon the death of a loved one. While the way you choose to distribute your assets upon your death is ultimately your decision, if there are already tensions that exist within your family, disinherited individuals could cause more points of contention after you pass away. They might challenge your will or harass the person you name as your executor or trustee. If you wish to leave as little conflict behind as possible after you’re gone, there are some ways you can try to get ahead of it and prevent further strain.
Communicate Openly And Honestly With Your Family Ahead Of Time
Much of the resentment and bitterness that a person feels upon learning they have been disinherited comes from shock, and when the person they are angry with is no longer alive, they must find another person to target their emotions at. If this person is one of your children, they might go after their siblings – especially if they were not disinherited. Even if you did not completely disinherit a certain individual, they may still feel cheated if they didn’t get what they thought they should have.
One way to soften the blow may be to simply be honest with your loved one ahead of time. It may involve a conversation that is uncomfortable, and they may still feel some sort of resentment towards you. However, there is also a possibility that after you explain your reasoning and rationale, they understand where you’re coming from and why you made the choices you did. The power of honest communication may surprise you and accomplish the goal you were hoping it would.
Choose Your Executor Or Trustee Carefully
Choosing the executor of your will or the trustee who will administer your trust should never be taken lightly, and your estate planning attorney can likely provide insight on how to best make the decision. The most obvious and important factor to consider first is whether or not a person is trustworthy. Since they will be responsible for following the instructions left in your will or the terms of your trust, they will have control of all of the money, property, and possessions you owned at the time of your death. Many times this will be your spouse, but many people are forced to choose between their children, which can be understandably difficult. If all of your children are honest and trustworthy individuals, next you’ll want to consider whether or not they can handle the responsibility of an executor or trustee. They will likely also be the person that is targeted by any family members you disinherit. If they cannot or do not want to bear the burden of a legal battle, then it is probably in your best interest to choose someone else.
Consider Strengths And Weaknesses
Nobody is perfect. People are flawed, and everyone’s individual strengths and weaknesses are not the same. When determining which friends or family members will inherit certain amounts of money or property, this can be especially important to remember. For example, some people just aren’t good at handling money. They may even have a problem with gambling or investing in the wrong places. In this case, it would probably not be a good idea to leave them a large sum of money.
In a more positive scenario, you may have a family member that struggles to make ends meet and would be greatly appreciative to inherit some amount of money or property. No matter the situation, the point is that you are putting thought into the individuals you are naming in your will or trust, as well as what you plan to leave them. Your estate planning attorney can help you consider things from all angles as they help you through the process. Their knowledge and experience will give you insight to factors you may not have considered before.
Update Your Will Or Trust As Needed
To expand on the points made above, life changes could cause you to reevaluate an individual’s strengths and weaknesses. This is why it is crucial to update your will or trust as you see fit. While tragic to say, it’s possible that a person you’ve chosen to inherit a significant amount of your assets passes away. It could also be possible to have a falling out with a loved one and you’ve decided to no longer leave them your money or possessions.
Again, positive life changes could cause you to want to make changes in your estate plans, too. Suppose you are blessed with a new grandchild and want to make sure they are included in your will or trust. Any number of things could warrant changes to your plans, so it’s important to remember to revisit them every so often.
Consult With Your Estate Planning Attorney
As already reiterated, the knowledge and advice of your estate planning attorney is invaluable. While you only have one experience with planning your estate, they possibly have hundreds. They have seen a multitude of scenarios and issues throughout their career from the multitude of individuals, couples, and families they have worked with. They will be the best source of guidance you can get, especially if you’re feeling especially conflicted or worried about potential family conflicts arising.
Trust The Villegas Law Firm To Help You Accomplish Your Goals
It is important to remember that you can’t please everyone – in life or death. There is a limit to the assets you are able to leave to your loved ones, and the reality is that not everyone can or will get exactly what they want. However, if creating as little conflict as possible is your last wish when you leave this Earth, our estate planning attorney will certainly do whatever it takes to help you achieve that goal. Our lead attorney, Jorge Villegas, has over 15 years of experience in helping Texans make plans for their families and can help you, too. Call today for a free consultation to learn more about our services.